Doubt is an integral part of a sinner's faith, and we should not be ashamed of it. There are times when we ask, "really, can this be it?” Should not something much more majestic, emotional and spiritual constantly be happening in me if God counts me among the holy? Could I not be escaping my present state, and become numb to pain? It is in these times that we cannot believe that Jesus was, is and will continue to be the full answer, the lamb slain for us. The "rock from which we were carved" (Isaiah 51). We keep looking for other sources of salvation, for leaders who are worthy to be followed in the world's eyes. We expect our own Goliath to show the way. We look for idols, and so often we find them, whether in the form of politicians, footballers, or even religious leaders. Or we look for some form of intuitive wisdom, karma that would help us escape our troubles and find salvation within ourselves. Even John the Baptist doubted. He of all people felt he needed to double-check even though Jesus was right there, physically with him. Indeed, seen from a humanist rational point of view, Jesus is completely counterintuitive to our senses. He does not make any sense to the notion of power as the world knows it. That the King of Kings would come as a helpless baby, and that eventually he would be helplessly nailed to the cross? Unheard of. But our God is not only a God of a crushing force of the "right hand", documented many times in the Old Testament. He also has a "left hand". And this left hand is - indescribable power arising from weakness. It is in this un-human power, when still today, by the gift of faith through grace, the blind continue to receive sight, the lame learn to walk. And ultimately, the dead are raised to life.
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